Conflicts start because of  misjudgments, misinformation and misunderstandings. If you understand how a conflict starts, you will be well on your way to resolving it. Here are 5 other areas you must consider to effectively deal with the conflicts you face.

1. Conflicts are a normal and healthy part of life. Since they will occur, what is most important is how we understand, resolve and learn from them.

2.   Some conflicts can be avoided entirely or kept from escalating. The more we understand our own style and attitudes about conflict and their causes, the fewer the occasions when conflicts may occur.

3.   Some conflicts are minor and should be resolved about the critical ones. Remember the adage, “choose your battles wisely.”

4.  There does not have to be a loser in a conflict. Our goal is to have a win-win outcome. If someone wins and someone loses, everyone loses.  There are techniques that can be used to work through a conflict so that everyone is a winner.  See link below on 15 ways to difficult people. http://www.arnoldsanow.com/uploads/15waystoDealwithDifficultPeople.pdf

5.   We can and must learn from our conflicts. If conflicts are going to happen whether or not they are beyond our control, then we might as well learn from each one and apply that knowledge in the future.

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Arnold Sanow, MBA, CSP is a speaker and coach who focuses on building stronger customer and workplace relationships. He is the author of  6 books to include, “Get Along with Anyone, Anytime, Anywhere.”

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